WHAT IT FEELS LIKE 4 AN INDEPENDENT ARTIST

It’s no secret that I am a fully independent artist. That means I have no label, no management, and a budget that would probably make you laugh. There is no other person that I have to answer to. I am my own boss. Which is amazing and I am grateful that I have that freedom. Freedom is being in control. Freedom is being in charge of my own success or destruction. Especially now. Many artists are speaking out about how labels have suppressed them and blocked them from expressing themselves in ways that fulfil them as an artist. However it is scary not having a safety net. Which brings the question in the very dusty back corner of my mind, can I keep going? My motivation is myself. My goals and aspirations are built in my mind. There is no one else setting goals for a single rollout or telling me what visuals I have to do or what kind of music I have to make. And as someone who loves things to be in order and perfect 100% of the time, this can get overwhelming. 

Dropping a song isn’t as simple as having an idea in my bedroom, recording it and dropping it the next Friday. There is a whole lot of work behind the scenes that most people don’t really talk about. Which is why it felt like I was hit by a truck when I realised everything I had to do to give myself even the slightest chance at being noticed. First of course, is the most fun part, creating the song. Simultaneously, when I’m in the studio or writing a song I immediately start thinking about the world that I am building around it. What would the cover look like? What sort of visuals could support it? Can I create choreography for this track? To me, all of that is as important as the song itself. Once the creative part is complete, then comes the most horrible, mind numbing process which is all of the admin. There is so much admin and so much can go wrong. Things have gone wrong in the past so every time I go to upload a new song it feels like I am about to drop into a hot volcano. Then of course, to get a song listened to by ears like yours, I need to create endless amounts of content. And I’ll be honest, a lot of the time I don’t get much back in return. I spend hours and hours creating content plans, brainstorming ideas, putting things together, editing all day long to find that the views barely break 1000. This can be very disappointing. Sometimes it makes me feel so unmotivated that I don’t even want to post on social media. But then how would I connect with you? It does get tiring. Posting on social media is like buying a lottery ticket. The more you buy the better your chances are  to win. The more I post, the greater my chance is to get noticed. Which is what I remind myself of when I feel lost. 

I am lucky enough to have the most amazing support system around me. My family are my first and biggest fans. They believe in every lyric I write, every move I dance and every crazy idea that comes out my mouth. My mum’s approach to anything any of us kids wanted to do is “how?” never “why?”.

I could wake up tomorrow and tell my Mum that I have a new idea of becoming a professional mermaid and she would help me find ways of becoming the best mermaid the world has ever seen. Her believing in me makes me believe in myself 100 times more. My family reminds me on days where I feel upset and disheartened that I don’t need anyone else to do this apart from my fans. And I remind myself that I am eternally grateful to have been put in this position. 

So yes, being an independent artist can be rough sometimes. But it always goes back to why I do any of this in the first place; Because I love music and performing more than anything. So I am giving it my all.